A Victim’s Love

My Knight in shining armor, so quick to the rescue
He speaks the perfect words – he can’t be superficial.

No fault does he have that I’m willing to see
Nothing I won’t excuse or pretend not to believe.

For, I feel so empty until he appears
Inside I am lost with many fears.

Too good to be true, he fulfills every need
I forgive all the lies and deny any warning.

Never to believe I deserve any good
I accept imitations
of the (only) love I’ve understood.

We settle down, a pretend smile on my lips
His manipulation and control, I still dismiss.

He beats me, rapes me and claims it’s my fault
He is sorry and loves me, he owns me no doubt.        

I hide and lie about the pain he inflicts
He says I’m not worthy, I must be punished.

Guilt, shame and fear – I pretend not to know
That it really is my choice… if I stay or if I go.

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7 Comments on “A Victim’s Love”

  1. Steven Sawyer Says:

    Wonderful words of encouragement from the experiences in your heart. God bless.

    Reply

  2. worshipandswag Says:

    It’s nice to have you back, Jessie! :)

    Reply

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

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    […] myself that I must be attractive and desirable. This is a natural reaction and consequence for most victims of abuse though. And even though I consider myself to be a survivor now, this is an area that still […]

  2. Abusive Relationships | Jessie Jeanine - September 6, 2014

    […] issues aside, that can make it hard to break the cycle and leave a relationship, because a victim will often times feel guilty or worry about hurting their abusers feelings. That’s because […]

  3. How To Move On (part 2) | Jessie Jeanine - January 31, 2014

    […] like they have stolen your voice forever, but the truth is, they can only stifle it. People who abuse are experts at finding ways to silence their victims, but it only takes courage to get it […]

  4. Pretty Woman | Jessie Jeanine - December 17, 2013

    […] most of my relationships and the way I grew up consisted of hearing only negative things, so it’s what I got used to. […]

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