I came across another post tonight which mentioned a scene from the movie “Pretty Woman.” It’s where Richard Gere gives Julia Roberts a kind and thoughtful compliment, but I guess instead of graciously accepting it she responds with “But did you ever notice how much easier it is to believe the bad stuff?” (It’s been a few years since I’ve seen the movie).
I don’t know about you, but it stirred my emotions and hit home. Maybe because it’s something I’ve dealt with for a long time now. Just think about this though…
Negative or Positive Compliments
The overall question is this… How much easier is it for you to accept the bad things about yourself (versus the good) even if they are not true?
Do you ever shy away from a positive compliment finding it difficult to accept? Do you struggle to believe it? Maybe your most natural reaction is to just brush it off and not take it seriously? Perhaps you automatically question the persons intentions and wonder what they want or expect from you?
If you hear something bad about yourself how quick are you to believe it? Do you easily accept it as truth without questioning it’s validity? How often do you engage in negative self talk?
Thoughts to Ponder
It is sad to think that positive compliments could affect some people negatively like this. However, that’s how it is for many, including myself. Why is it so easy for us to accept and believe the negative, but not the positive?
Personally, most of my relationships and the way I grew up consisted of hearing only negative things, so it’s what I got used to. I think it boils down to trust, still believing the best in everyone and not allowing the past to affect our future in such a negative way.
What about you? Do you ever struggle with receiving compliments? Or finding that balance between humility and self love? May we not only learn how to graciously accept compliments, but to believe them as well!
- Richard Gere and Julia Roberts in the Movie Runaway Bride (married.answers.com)
- Do You Measure Up? (jessiejeanine.com)
- As If Being Abused Isn’t Enough (jessiejeanine.com)