We have all been hurt in the past,
but do you carry the hurts and disappointments with you like old baggage?
Does it interfere with your current relationships?
Are you fearful, angry or distrusting of the opposite sex?
Check Your Baggage
All of our experiences (the good, the bad and the ugly) help mold and shape our lives, aiding in our uniqueness, and affecting every choice we make. Therefore, it seems we are never as free as we might think.
So, the key is to find a partner who will help us unpack!
Otherwise, you might find your head in the clouds with someone who just expects you to dump it all in the sea as you fly by. Better yet, is the one who will attempt to throw it all out when your back is turned and you’re busy getting him a drink!
Where’s my parachute?
Sometimes, we may not realize what baggage we are still carrying around until we come face to face with an amazing person and the fairy tale signs of a promising relationship. You may find yourself wondering in the midst of the journey, “is that really mine?”
Unpack Your Bags
I struggle with the idea of finding someone to help me unpack (verses doing it alone) because it does not seem fair to them. Nor, does it does seem fair to the next relationship if I am making comparisons of the past out of anxiety and fear.
Doesn’t the new person in our life deserve a clean slate and a fair chance to experience something wonderful? Don’t our new relationships deserve every opportunity to grow and thrive without the past interfering or hindering our future?
Then I think…
what better way to form bonds, to grow, to learn and trust
than by unpacking your baggage together!
That doesn’t mean we don’t take responsibility and deal with things on our own still. We should learn what we can from our past, then let the rest go. To be fair, we should allow ourselves the time to mature and go through that process before we begin searching for our next partner.
I think no matter how much healing and preparation we’ve done on our own though, we are still going to have some pieces of luggage that got misplaced along our travels, or pieces that we later find were hiding in the cargo department all along.
The best traveling advice I can give then
is to find a partner who will help you pick up the pieces, explore what is left,
and complete the journey with you!