Since the last post when I reported that we were finally approved for a place to live and were supposed to be moving in this week…
No can do!
It ain’t happening!
We still have no home… ugh!
(How’s that for ‘proper’ english, lol!)
Not only did the management company lie to us about a handful of things, but I found out the CEO is splashed all across the papers and the news here, not to mention a police department (with a never ending investigative file) who’s sick of dealing with him and the half a dozen other properties he owns around the area.
So… in the hotel we stay and back on the hunt we go!
It’s A God Thing
Next, our new Uganda friends asked permission of their landlord if we could stay with them where they’re at for about a week and he said yes. So, we spent the day visiting and had such a wonderful time. We shared so much regarding the things of God too, and before we knew it the day had passed :) So, I believe our meeting was a God thing and I’m extremely grateful, but there are reasons why it wouldn’t be a good choice for us to stay there, which is OK.
Back to the hotel… again…
Call the realtor… again…
Research and drive around… again!
When We Compromise Too Much
Desperation can make us do things we would never otherwise do and accept things we wouldn’t even otherwise entertain.
So, perhaps in an effort to keep humility in check and be a good Christian, I’ve also always been a very agreeable person. I’ll go out of my way to put everyone else’s needs before my own and can often benefit from having someone else remind me that I should be taking better care of myself first. I am definitely a people pleaser and will care about another’s well being first and foremost every time.
But, there is a difference between making compromises, and lowering our standards too much or allowing ourselves to be walked all over.
It seems that whenever a crisis hits, the devil is quick to make a camouflaged visit in his best effort to temporarily ease our pain and suffering. Most often, he offers us some quick solution which appears like it’s a good fix and will be helpful, but in reality it will actually make things worse.
I have been willing to compromise and settle way too much out of pure desperation, but I’m finally putting an end to that now. God wants all which is good for us. We should care enough about ourselves that we aren’t willing to lower our standards and expectations so much that it ends up destroying us or making things worse. Good intentions aside, I’ve made too many decisions like that over the past year which have ended up hurting us way more than helping us and I’ve lost everything in the process, even to include my health at times. That is not good!
Just The Basics Please
So, I’ve always been a home owner and renter who did quite well during most of my girl’s life. This transition has taken a lot of getting used to and not only has income dramatically shifted, but so have our needs as a family. I appreciated having land, very spacious homes, and toys for everyone to play with while she was growing up… but now she’s gone so much of the time and I don’t even have pets to care for anymore. Therefore, the needs are based more around college, a second vehicle, etc.
I’m becoming an empty nester
who’s struggling with how to enjoy this season of life.
That means the basic necessities now are simply central AC, washer/dryer and a garage/carport in a safe neighborhood. I could care less about anything else, how it looks, or even the amount of space it has for the moment. Those couple of things needed are mostly for health reasons, so if I have to compromise even them due to finances, then I get sick again and can’t work, etc. It’s the snowball effect with a never ending cycle.
So, then (upon deciding this) I’m told by one supporter to just go find someplace decent, because they’re going to provide the down deposit for a place now. Instead of my usual response of feeling guilty and in tears, I’m exclaiming with joy “absolutely!” How about I maintain certain standards to at least ensure that our basic needs are meant and allow the blessings to continue rolling uphill instead. I’ve always had such high standards and expectations for others ~ it’s OK to have them for myself too!
How can God bless us with the new when we’re still clinging to the old?
If we want God’s blessings in life we have to make room for them!
Finally, how can He bless us if we don’t make our needs be known?
Believing Things Will Line Up!
Recent lessons have been teaching me that I haven’t really been trusting God like He wants me to. I haven’t truly believed that He would continue to provide and care for us. Otherwise, I wouldn’t be so full of fear and stress over it.
So, all of this means that I have to keep trusting God and having even more faith that He will continue to meet our needs during the next couple of months. I have to believe the provisions will be there even if I can’t see them (including my daughter’s college) as we get settled here once again and establish some new revenues of income.
Also, some of you may remember when I dabbled with a series back in California regarding the ability to be content whether we’re abased or abound… Well, I don’t think I was ready back then and God knew it. I’m learning a lot more now though and plan on recreating that lesson again in the future (and yes… I am smiling!)
*Personal Note: Overall, I have been blessed with a couple of regular monthly supporters thus far, and connections have been growing rapidly the past few weeks (especially on LinkedIn.) Perhaps, that means there are new opportunities on the horizon!